>> Aug 3, 2013
'Teen' years are believed to be the most difficult part of your child's life since this is the time, when they are angry, nervous, loving and emotional all the time. They experiment with their dressing style and somehow manage to tickle your patience and push it to the edge. Well, sorry to tell you that, but there is nothing you can do. The only thing, that can actually help you in this case, is finding a way to get on well with them and patiently wait for them to open their eyes for reality.
Although we all try to be patient and understanding, there are still some people that find it very difficult to trust their teenagers. They still think of them as stupid, little kids that can easily get depressed and angry. But the truth is that teenagers need our support, understanding and advice more than we need them to be calm. At the same time, some serious talks would not be irritating for them, if we manage to stay calm and behave as we're having a normal conversation with someone at our age.
Our concerns about the economical crisis, about saving the planet or the crimes, we read about in the newspaper every day, built the way they will see the world one day. We somehow forget to teach them about the good aspects of life; about the things that really worth the whole struggling. Surrounded by negativity and hatred, our teenagers in fact cannot understand how easy it is to think positively and we're supposed to show them.
Well, teenagers love new technologies – smartphones, tablets, computers. And there is nothing wrong about that. Actually, we can always learn something new from them. Nowadays, technologies have become a great part of our lives and because of the social networks, our children are aware of the latest news and fashions. These modern gadgets are in fact very useful and functional and the fact that every teenager is able of using them is quite impressing.
Talking properly with teenagers is the key to their trust. Even if you're a bit worried about their reaction, you have to show some interest in their problems. As we mentioned before, they're full of emotions and anxiety, and teaching them how to share is up to you.
Too much curiosity
If you have planned on asking a hundred questions about the new boyfriend or school, we must tell you that this would be the perfect way to push a teenager away. Young people enjoy their privacy and fight for it in every way possible. You will be told something like 'It's none of your business. Leave me alone.' Perhaps this is the right place to emphasize that the 'conversation' we mentioned before, referred to more casual things. Being interested in your child's life is good, but don't go too far.
Let teenagers make their own decisions
The first thing you will have to understand is that your child is an independent individual and he/she is able of making their own choices and decisions. This is the only way to make them be a bit more responsible and face the consequences of their own mistakes and failures. Be supportive and understanding, give advice and help, but don't try to decide instead of them.
Emma Trevisani is a loving mother of two teenagers and she knows how to communicate with them. She works in a Chiswick cleaning agency and she prefers to spend the weekends with her family.