How to Say ‘No’ to Your Child

There are many parents who can’t refuse children’s requests. Every time their children want something, these parents always try to fulfill it. An expert said that abundant affection is the cause of these parents’ behavior. It’s actually a normal thing, but you shouldn’t always follow their desires.

The research result of Centre for a New American Dream showed the confession of more than 50% children: owning certain goods make they are accepted in association. This assumption not only happens at rich family, but also at indigent family.

If you, as parents, always accomplish your child’s wants, it will affect negatively for her/his character. Your child will grow to be a spoiled, disappointed easily, dependent and not-ready-to-accept-reality child. That’s why you should learn to say ‘No’ to your child in a wise and proper way. Don’t say ‘No’ with forcing or yelling; it will make your child more upset or even causing trauma to your child.

Here are tips for you:

• State your refusal with clear and honest argument. Express it in simple language, so that your child will understand it well. Be honest is important! Children can’t be lied. Be careful in saying words, if you lie often to your children; you can loose their trust.


• The ‘No’ words should be enjoyable for both parents and child. The child doesn’t feel to be forced and the parents don’t feel to do mistake.


• You should make your child used to accept arguments since young age. It can push your child’s thinking ability. Your child will be encouraged to think critically, be more creative and recognize the causal rules earlier.


• Ask your child to see the fact that goods which he/she wants can’t be fulfilled at the time.


• If refusing the request, you should give other solution.


• Bring your child together to look for wanted goods. Indirectly, you encourage your child to be able to accept the fact which is possible disappointing.

Rewrite source: tempo and google
Picture source : scottcounseling.com

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CC: Have I Told You Lately that, I Love You?

This week’s Couple’s Corner related to my last post, Romance in a Marriage. In my opinion, saying “I love you” sincerely is also a good way to express affection and appreciation to your partner. As I wrote before, husbands and wives should realize that each couple has basic need to be loved and to get attention. Only material needs aren’t enough. 

My hubby is an expressive person, he always says “I love you so much” or “I mad about you” or “Do you know that I adore you so much” several times every day. Silly me, sometimes I’m too lazy to answer it back, “I love you, too” or likewise. I just make a sound,”Hmmm, thank you” or just nodding my head. Have I done a mistake here? Being compared with my hubby’s habit, I more seldom to convey my affection with words “I love you”. I most like hugging him.

Since this CC is about saying “I Love You” with deep feelings, well, I can say here precisely that it just happened at Jan 26th, a few days ago. How come? Because it was my birthday, hehehe. I didn’t cry; but I was so touched and I felt so appreciated. Dear hubby, thanks for your love, wish our love get stronger every day… 

Do you want to know other’s stories? Click the badge above…

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Romance in a Marriage Life

How’s your relationship with your husband/wife? Is romantic things expressed by kisses, touches and hugs still there?

Romantic love usually only happened at the time of couple are interested each other. Both feeling cannot live without its couple and always wish to be together. This kind of love will end after a few moments. Entering marriage life, romantic love usually will fade. The fading romantic love can result the value friction, your couple become part that is felt no longer need special attention.

This value friction usually happens since 5-10 years of marriage. Even wife position at home can shift into the part of household appliances that must be there at home to arrange daily life.

Actually married couple needn't maintain this romantic love, but you must avoid the loss of meaning of wife/husband attendance as individual that requiring love and attention truly happen. It can be source of physically illness; because the wife and husband can feel depressed, lonely, and sadness.

Why wives are more often become victims of less romance in their marriage lifes? Women usually spend more time at home, while husbands have association and career outside, so that they don’t irritate much with separate relationship with wives. Husbands also sometimes unconscious with this problem, because they feel that they have already worked to make a living for family. They feel their responsibilities as husbands have fulfilled with giving enough material things to their family.

I myself don’t want this situation really happens to me. I don’t want my husband neglects and only assumes me as a complement of household appliances. Like wise, you shouldn’t assume your husband only as a money searcher machine.

In order to avoid these situation happen, romance in certain rate has to be maintained in building harmony of a marriage. Romance here is interpreted as an effort to maintain caring and sensitivity to individual aspect of each couple.

Husband and wife should realize that each couple has basic human need to be loved and to get attention. Only material needs aren’t enough. The complete human need the attendance beside his/her couple is affected and appreciated; she/he isn’t only a wage earner, a house keeper or a house complement.

Brighten your marriage with warm and full of affection relationship. Fill your marriage life daily with smiles, laughs, eyes sights, kisses, touches, hugs and attention. Have a happy marriage life, everyone…
rewrite source: swara and google
picture source:allposters.com

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Camera Critters: a Fly's Face

For this week’s Camera Critters, I share a photo that I received from a friend of my hubby. I hope you can enjoy its face, hehehe…. If you’re an animal lover, find more animal photos by clicking the badge above. Happy week end!

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Couple’s Corner : How Well do We Know Each Other?

Being together for more than seven years, make me knows my hubby well enough. I can’t say that I’ve known him very well; because sometimes I’m still questioning what he desires. Getting married with someone also means you have been ready to have a new life. Your life isn’t the same anymore…

Married couple should think as a team, should think as ‘we’. In workplace, a team can work well, if members of the team recognize each other. Likewise in a marriage life, you should try to know your spouse more. If you have no intention at all to recognize your spouse, you must ask yourself what’s the purpose of your marriage.

Until now, I still try to know my hubby more and more. I’ll write a little bit here about him.
He likes to have breakfast in bed; and a cup of coffee is a must. He prefers breads for breakfast. He actually likes his coffee sweet, but I try to decrease his sugar intake. He likes hot chili spicy food. He likes his chicken noodle without gravy and ketchup on it. He likes his french fries with chili sauce and pepper.

He likes action movies, especially Steven Seagal and Jet Lee. He is a vespa fan. He likes to drive. He likes bargaining in a flea market. He likes to sleep (on his holidays). He doesn’t like if I don’t answer his question quickly. He doesn’t like if I don’t stare at him every time he talks. He can do every kind of household tasks, except ironing clothes (he hates it).

He’s a sentimental person with a soft heart; he can cry when watching sad things. He’s too lazy to read newspapers every morning; he prefers to watch TV news programs. He often talks when he’s sleeping, and he can have several dreams in just one night. He’s so funny; he can impersonate other person like a comedian. He’s a caring and full of affection person; but don’t you dare to break his trust.

Well, it’s just a brief of things about my hubby. If you want to know more stories, click the CC badge above.

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My Horta Grass Doll

This post isn’t a paid one. I write this because I appreciate the ideas. The creators are the college students of Bogor Agriculture Institute (the same college with me). Horta grass doll is actually a plant media that packaged in various doll forms.

There are several horta doll forms such as horta head cup, panda bear, turtle, cow, frog, pig, cat and monkey. If you’re spraying water (just a little) to the doll every day, the grass -which seeds have planted on one part of doll’s body surface- will grow. The growth speed of the grass is so fast; and it’s so fun to watch the addition of grass length every day. Only in two days, grass length can increase until three times.

Horta dolls can become new alternatives of educative, creative and imaginative dolls for children. Your child can play and also learn. Like I do, your child will love watching the growing grass. You can ask your child to measure the grass length several times per day. You can also teach your child a responsibility. By giving her/ him a task to spray water on its horta doll body every day, you have already given a good lesson to care something. If the grass has grown too long, your child can cut and form the grass according to your child’s desire and style.

Despite its positive aims, I noticed that there aren’t yet standard shapes in all products. I still see doll cat head shapes are different one another. I don’t know how the doll is built; hope they can fix it; because the standardization is related to quality maintenance. One more thing, I also think that they should increase doll’s appearance to look more attractive. Applying more colors with waterproof paint might be able to brighten the doll’s looks.

You can also place these dolls to decorate your home. I place my horta doll on my computer table. While I’m using the computer, I can see its cute face and touch the grass…

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For Couples: How to Manage Your Finance in Harmony

Every married couple realizes that finance problem, whether involves small or big amount of money, can become the cause of quarrelling in your relationship. Finance problem itself usually happens if there is lack of communication and cooperation between couples.

In this post, I’ll mention several tips how to manage your finance in harmony. Here they are:

Organize your finance things.You have to create a finance management system which can work for both. All documents that related to finance transaction such as chequebooks, receipts and others should be compiled in one place. All things that related to ‘to be paid’ file (payments of credit cards, car, insurances, monthly mortgage, etc) should be also placed in the same place. You can use a help of finance consultant if you need their advice to manage your expenses.

Write down your finance information in detail.
It will ease you both if you have detailed finance information.

Arrange a schedule of regular finance meetings.
Take your time to sit down together with your spouse and then discussing your financial condition. Do it regularly.

What can you discuss in every finance meeting with your spouse?

• Manage all finance information’s which have term limit payments. Organize them based on its amount and due date in an easy-to-read format.


• Analyze your expenses together. Compare your monthly income with your monthly expenses.

Find solutions on every problem or find ways to increase your earnings. The point is, face and solve your problem together.

The truly aim of this finance meeting is to make you both as a good and strong team.

Rewrite source: kesehatankeuangan.blogspot.com
Picture source : newsroom.Ids.org

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