Is It Better To Divorce Or Not?
>> Jul 14, 2017
Any kind of
relationship is hard work that requires
dedication and diligence from both sides, and, although the love can appear unexpectedly,
it will not last forever if you don’t invest time and efforts in keeping it. That
is why so many couples tend to divorce today.
Although it
is not easy to find the answer to the question “to divorce or not,” in this article, I will try to give you
enough information that can help you overcome the family issues and survive
this stage of your life.
What If You Are Thinking About A Divorce?
If you are the
initiator of the divorce and your partner doesn’t know about your plans or
doesn’t support your idea, you should not hurry and carefully think about all
the nuances and possible consequences of this step. The easiest way to make a
decision is to ask a few concrete
questions. Or write down the answer for each of them and take a look at these
answers after a few days, when you will be able to stay cold minded.
Ask yourself
– what benefits can you get from this step, how will your life situation
change, will this help you reach your dreams or goals, are you ready for the
consequences that the divorce can cause? Then ask a few opposite questions. What will you lose after making this
decision, what issues you may face, will this hurt you or someone you love and are you ready to overcome all of
these emotions and difficulties?
You have to
be honest and sincere while giving your answers. Basically, the answers to all
of these queries can give you a clear
idea of whether you really want to let your partner go and start a new life without
him or her. Thus, this step is crucial!
Also, it will be good if you can support each of your answers with an argument
or two that explain why you gave these particular responses.
What If This Is Your First Love?
Divorcing
with the first partner is always painful. Such passionate, tender, and sincere,
first love is a significant event in the life of every person, but the
disappointing statistic confirms that first love does not always last long. In
accordance with the 32 shocking divorce statistics created
based on the discoveries of the National Vital Statistics System, the
biggest divorce rate can be observed among couples whose age is between 20 and
24 years.
Thus,
students are in the largest risk group.
However, this is not strange. Quite often people meet their “big love” while
studying at the college or university and decide to marry after a year or a
few. But, being inexperienced in family matters they rarely can maintain their
relationships. Besides, the huge load of homework and studies puts too much
stress and does not leave any free time for family, which is another common
reason that causes many misunderstandings.
However,
even in such case, there is a solution. It is natural that your husband or wife
wants to get your attention no matter what and thus, in order to save family
you will have to rid yourself off some of this load to have more free time. For
example, you can view here essay papers for sale and request
some professional help to save your time that you can spend with the beloved
one!
What If Your Partner Is An Initiator?
In this
case, not much depends on you. However, there are a few things that you can do
in relation to this:
- Offer him or her to have a talk to reach understandings in all matters, discuss the issues that your couple has, and try to find a compromise;
- Surround your second half with care and love to show how much he or she means to you;
- Give your partner some space and enough time to analyze the situation and calmly make a decision;
- Offer to make an appointment with a professional family psychologist to get expert marriage advice and obtain support during this complicated stage of your lives.
Why Is It Good To Turn To A Psychologist?
The crisis
of relationships is a common thing that many couples experience. However, not
everyone can overcome all these difficulties and save the family without
turning to a professional family therapist and thus,
there is nothing wrong about asking for help!
Besides, if
there is no way to save your marriage, then a psychologist will help you both to
survive a divorce without hurting
each other and your children!
What Is The Best Solution?
The best
thing you can do is to keep fighting! Fight for your marriage as long as
possible and do not destroy the family, while there is at least some
opportunity to improve your relationships and avoid the divorce!
Author’s
Bio: The author of this
article – Paul Calderon is a professional family therapist with many years of
experience. Due to the specifics of his job, Paul has to deal with many couples
who are balancing on the verge of divorce and come to him to make one last
attempt to change the situation. Throughout his experience, Paul has helped
many couples to survive the crisis, detect and eliminate the causes of their
problems, find a compromise, and maintain their relationships. In this post, Paul
Calderon shares some of his secrets and techniques that will help you overcome
the issues and answer the main question – “to divorce or not”!
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